HEALING FROM INFIDELITY is a delicate process and can't be rushed. It's important to recognize that the foundation your relationship is built on has been damaged and must be rebuilt. Saying "I'm sorry" isn't enough to rebuild emotional trust and create a new beginning.  After the "honeymoon phase" when you are both anxious to promise your best, you have to make your foundation stronger and more solid in order to move forward. Just promising isn't enough.  
REBUILDING TRUST is not easy after betrayal. To heal your relationship after infidelity there are common pitfalls couples must deal with: when do you tell too much or not enough, how long should you reassure, and is trying to "forget about it" counterproductive? The biggest mistake you can make is to sweep it under the rug and ignore it.
A NEW BEGINNING is the only way to heal from infidelity. You both have to be serious about loving each other at a higher level of love! Going back to "how it was" will keep trust low, insecurity high, and it won't work. Remember "how it was" led you to the poor choices of infidelity so settling for it again is simply not smart. If you go back to "how it was" you are at risk.  Raise your relationship to a higher level of love and you will be able to rebuild trust and feel secure and solid again! 


Dr Catherine Wheeler
Corona , Ca 92879